Friday, January 6, 2017

Books I've Been Reading

   So if you know me, you know that I love to read. While I do have the Kindle app on my phone, I prefer an actual physical book. There is just something about holding it in your hands and being immersed into the world it creates in your mind. Being able to escape into the world the author has created - I love it! Don't get me wrong, I do read books other than fiction - it's what this post is actually going to be about.
   I just finished 2 very different books. One related to my world of ministry, and one related to church health. These books were very different and my reaction to each book was drastically different.
   Let's start with the church health one. It was given to me to read last year, and it took me a while to find the time to actually read it with everything else I wanted to read. I finally had time just after Christmas this year. The author of this book is from a different church denomination than the one I am in. While reading his book, I could more or less agree with the principles he was describing on evaluating church health. I may not stand the same as him on every point he wrote, but I can understand and mostly agree. It's the last chapter that I really had trouble with. My first reaction was hate and hurt. How could he be saying things like that, and how could this book be given to me? While I am still not a fan of this book, I've had some time to "cool-off" my reaction. It's not a book I would easily recommend others to read (hence why I'm not naming the book or author here), but as I've had time to reflect and think about it, I've learned and realised a few things. First, while I don't agree with everything this author states in his book, I've been learning how to appreciate the other opinion side than where I stand. It becomes hard when it almost feels like it's an "attack" against my position, but I've been learning that's it's not about me personally. It's a belief system that has 2 sides to it. While I definitely don't agree with the extremes of this belief system, I can appreciate that they are both there. It doesn't make either of us wrong, but human. Second, I've come to appreciate it because it gives me a glimpse into the other side of this debate. I have to write a paper next year for my ordination and this book actually may be one or my references. I really dislike books like this that are of one mindset - ones that have no regard for the other side of things. In the case of this book, it's denomination-specific (there are hundreds of different denominations with varying ideas on this subject), and in some aspect church specific to his specific church. It really annoys me when authors are that close-minded and don't acknowledge the other side of a debate. I know he's writing on a particular side of this debate, but still. Maybe it's just the topic, but I'm still not a fan of this book. Lastly, it makes me grateful that I am in a denomination that accepts me. One that acknowledges both sides of this debate and gives grace to both sides. That's all I'm going to say about that book. If you want to talk to me more about it, we can do it in person.
   The second book I just finished is one that is changing how I think about and do ministry. Doug Fields "Your First Two Years in Youth Ministry." If you could see my copy of this book, there are sticky notes and sticky tabs everywhere. I've underlined and starred a lot of this book, it's that good! I don't remember where I first saw this book, but I am so grateful that I picked it up! It's about knowing where to start and how to start. Fields talks about connecting with parents, relating to students, dealing with difficult people and volunteers. How to connect with your leaders and your leadership - both above and below you. How to navigate change and knowing the phases that come with change.
   I am newer to Youth Ministry. If you've read my blog before, you will have read some of my story. While I had some experience with youth ministry, this is my first position as a youth pastor (and the children's pastor!). It's a complicated role to navigate at times and knowing how and when to do things. Don't get me wrong, I love what I get to do. I love being able to minister to and work with children and youth, but it's a different path to navigate. That's why I am very grateful I picked up this book! I am excited to be able to put some of his principles in to place and to learn how to be a better youth pastor to my youth and for our church. There is a ton of practical advice for newer (or new to) youth pastors. It's not only going to help me survive being a youth pastor, but also to thrive in my role. It's a book that not only is going to help me now as I'm just in my second year as a youth pastor, but as I continue to serve in this role. This book is going to be something I continually look at and use.
   I love books like this! When you find an awesome book that encourages and lifts you up it's a book to hang on to! If you are new to Youth Ministry (or know someone who is) I highly recommend this book!

Friday, March 4, 2016

Good Good Father

It's probably not what you think... It's a song title. I was at a network meeting this week and this was one of the songs that we sang. In light of everything that has happened over the last months this song hits home. It goes like this:

Good Good Father - Chris Tomlin
Oh, I've heard a thousand stories of what they think you're like
But I've heard the tender whisper of love in the dead of night
And you tell me that you're pleased
And that I'm never alone

You're a Good, Good Father
It's who you are, it's who you are, it's who you are
And I'm loved by you
It's who I am, it's who I am, it's who I am

Oh, and I've seen many searching for answers far and wide
But I know we're all searching
For answers only you provide
Cause you know just what we need
Before we say a word

Cause you are perfect in all of your ways
You are perfect in all of your ways
You are perfect in all of your ways to us

Oh, it's love so undeniable
I, I can hardly speak
Peace so unexplainable
I, I can hardly think

As you call me deeper still [x3]
Into love, love, love

If you don't know, my family was rocked hard these last 2 months. 2 months ago, my Oma passed away. Exactly 4 weeks later, my Opa passed as well. While their passing is hard, and it will be for a while, I find comfort knowing that they are both free of pain and suffering and worshipping at the feet of Jesus. While it's still hard knowing that they are gone, there is peace that comforts me. Peace in knowing that they are with their Savior and that I will one day see them again. My family is dealing with this in many different ways. Some are searching for answers that they may never get, others are finding answers in the only place they come from.

One thing I have come to know over these last 2 months is that God is never far from where I need Him. He has provided friends who comfort, and a church family that truly cares. He is there when I am so overcome with emotion and crying my eyes out. He is there in the memories - reminding me of how much I was loved and how much their faith has been passed down through the generations. He is there giving me peace when I can't fathom that they are gone. He is there in the hope - in me knowing that this isn't the end and that there is so much more to come after we die. Death isn't the end. There is still eternity with Jesus to come for those who accept Him and the life He gives.

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Welcome to 2016

So life has changed a lot since I last updated my blog. My last post was about my graduation and my grad trip! A lot has happened since then... so I might have more than 1 update for you (and it might be a long one...)!

Let's travel through the Summer months...

May was all about graduation and job hunting... I had been in a few conversations with some churches and while some of them didn't really pan out.. a few looked promising. But mostly I worked and kept looking for jobs. May was also the month that my grandfather passed away. It was weird going to his funeral, but my nieces made up for it. We were at the grave site saying our final goodbyes after he had been lowered into the grave. My soon-to-be 4 year old niece looked into the hole and said "Good-bye Great Grandpa! Have fun in Heaven!" Only from the mouth of a child! But truer words there wasn't.

June brought some more interviews and resumes sent out. At this point it was starting to feel like I was never going to find a job. The church I had been working at had graciously extended my contract until the end of the summer so I wasn't too worried about a job for the summer... but knew I had to find where God wanted me. I had an interview with a small church in Northern Saskatchewan and it looked promising! It was almost what I wanted... but I figured it didn't hurt to move forward with them.
June was also the month that my bestie left for a summer at camp... We had been housemates for over a year at that point and we loved living together! It was going to be an interesting summer!

July marked my candidating! If you don't know what that is, it means that I travel to a church and see what it would be like at the church there... for me it also meant sharing about my life and connecting with the youth and families of that church. I drove to this small town in Saskatchewan for a weekend and left feeling positive. It also felt like God was asking me if I truly trusted Him and His plan for my life. At that point, I said yes, but believing that I was going to end up at this church. I got a call about a week later saying that they felt that God wasn't bringing our paths together. Honestly, I think I was expecting that. It was the conversation with God on my home the previous week that gave me the feeling. I wasn't over-joyed at that point, but kept trusting that God would bring me where He wanted me.
I have to say that at this point, I had already been talking with a church that was looking for a Children's Pastor (also in Saskatchewan - but not so small of a town). There was also a church that I had looked at but while I was interested in the position, I really didn't want to be in another Chinese church or so far from my family - so I dismissed it from my mind. I was, in essence, telling God that I would go where He placed me with conditions... not always a good thing to do... but more on that in a bit!
Back to this other Saskatchewan church.. They decided to fly me in for a day of interviews.

Welcome to August!
The interviews went well, and I flew home that night positive about this. I could see myself working at the church and living in that city. But about a week later I got the phone call. The one saying that we were not moving forward with candidating. I was crushed. I didn't know what to do. Here it was almost the end of August and I had no job.. so what did I do? I moved home. S&A were moving north because she got a job that she loves so I had to find something else... so I moved home.

Welcome to September
 I was able to spend some time with my brother and his family at the beginning of September. I really was excited to be spending time with them. I was already in conversations with 2 other churches at this point. The job description for both churches were essentially the same - both were Pastors of Children and Youth Ministries. One was the church that I had grown up in and the other? Well, remember that church that I had previously decided that I really didn't want to work at... well... it was that church. God had been doing some work in my heart and reminding me that I had said yes to His plan when He called me into ministry. It wasn't really right to say no to going somewhere because I didn't want to.
The first church I didn't really want the position they were offering. I didn't really want to go back to small town British Columbia after all God had done in my life over the last 10 years. So I said "Ok God. If you are calling me to this other church then you have to open the doors. You lead and I will go. If you are calling me here then I will go."
Well... I had my first round of interviews on a Monday afternoon. The interview went really well. I was able to communicate well and we parted ways...expecting to hear back within a week if they wanted to move forward with the next interviews.

I'm going to interject here... When I told God that I would go it was almost as if He said "FINALLY! Let's do this!" This process with the church was definitely God leading.

Back to the process... I was expecting to hear back from the church at about the week mark - enough time for them to talk about me and to bring me up to the board... well... It was 45 minutes after my interview that they called me back. They wanted to bring me in to candidate for a weekend at the beginning of October. I was shocked! It was definitely God's doing. They were going to make the recommendation to the Elder's Board to bring me in. So I said yes to candidating!

It was at this point that I was also preparing myself for the possibility of them saying no to me. It had happened before - so it could happen again... but this round felt different than previously.

I flew to Winnipeg on Oct. 2 to candidate and it went well. I really enjoyed getting to know people and being able to meet the kids and youth I would be working with. While I was there, I managed to get in a few more interviews - including the one with the Board of Elders and the Children's Ministry Team. It was an extremely full weekend and as I flew home that Monday, I knew that God was definitely doing something.

I was supposed to hear back at the very least a week later - time enough for everyone to give their feedback and opinions. Time enough for them (and me) to pray and discern where God was leading... well... like I said, I flew home that Monday and late Wednesday night I got an email from one of the church Elders saying that I got the job!!! They were going to draft an offer letter to me and that they were excited God brought our paths together!

While I may have originally said that I didn't want to work in a Chinese church again, I came to the realization that God had been preparing me for this over the last 10 years. Moving to Edmonton and attending a Chinese church and then to Calgary to pursue my MALM and working in a Chinese Church had all prepared me for this position. That doesn't mean that it doesn't come with its challenges but that God had been leading and directing me here.

SO I moved at the end of October to Winnipeg, Manitoba. I moved halfway across the country because I believe that God has called me here to serve this church. I can't believe how much God has done to prepare me for this and how much He has already blessed me here.

As I am sitting here writing this, I have been in Winnipeg for 3.5 months already. I have friends here and great co-workers. Together we are serving our church and God has called each of us here. I have gotten involved with a small group and they have been wonderful to get to know and a great group to be apart of. Their support, laughter, and friendship has been such a blessing as I have started this next phase of my life.

It doesn't mean that this job doesn't have its difficulties or mountains to climb... because it most definitely does... but it means that God has been faithful to what He has called me to. If you've read any of my previous posts you will (or should) see that God has been leading and directing my life. He has led me here. He promised me this when He called me to ministry. I've discovered that it is only when you look back on what God has done can you see how all your experiences line up to what He has called you to do. I never imagined that when I walked into my church in Edmonton that God was going to call me into ministry - and at a Chinese church no less!

God has been faithful and I know He will continue to be. I will definitely been keeping you updated more often on what God has been doing! Sufficient to say... I am excited to be here in Winnipeg and working with this church. I am also excited to see how God is going to use me here.

If you've made it to the end, I applaud you! It's a long update but a needed one! I've got more to share, but for today this is enough.

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Post Grad

These last 6 weeks feel like nothing. Here's what happened! I finished my Masters, Graduated, went on a grad trip with my parents, and a trip to Kelowna for my grandfathers funeral. It's been a whirlwind of a few weeks. Between my grad trip and my trip to Kelowna, I was super jet lagged! So let's catch you up!
My parents took me to Quebec for my grad trip! We went to Montreal, Quebec City, and then spent a day in Ottawa! I took over 600 pictures and loved every moment of it! It was good to spend a week with my parents and to spend the time exploring this beautiful country of ours! If we are facebook friends, there will be pictures up eventually, if we are not, then I'm sorry - no photos for you!
In this time I also had yet another interview with a church. So far, I've applied to 6 churches and have interviewed with 3 of them. The others I haven't heard back from. All these churches have chosen to go with others who have also applied for these positions. So here I am, 1 week until the end of my contract at my current position, and nothing yet on the horizon. I am having a harder time with this, but I am also choosing to trust God and the fact that He has a plan for my life. I wouldn't have gone through all of this just to do nothing...right? I'm choosing to trust Him.

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Life Update!

   I wrote back in September about all the changes in my life that were coming up. It's been almost 8 months since my last posting and I can't believe how much has happened. I started September with only 4 classes left of my Masters degree. I am sitting in the Seminary Commons right now with 2 three hour classes left of this degree. I can't believe how fast this year has gone and that in less than 4 weeks I graduate! It's INSANE!
   Let's catch you up. My job has been going well. I have been there almost 2 years now and I love being with those children and families. I am leaving the church though and am excited to see where God is leading. I have learned a lot these last months that is and has prepared me for my future ministry placement. I have learned how to deal with different situations regarding parents, volunteers, and children. I have gone through some major life lessons and God has been faithful in providing all that I need. He has given me people in my life where I am free and able to talk through things with and people who have continued to support me in all aspects. I am extremely thankful for those who provide a listening ear and sound advice and encouragement.
   Back in February, I went through the licensing process with the Christian and Missionary Alliance denomination. I passed! So I am officially a licensed worker with the C&MA. I never imagined that this is where God would take me. I knew when I started this schooling process that I would eventually go through it, but it never really sunk it how much it would matter to me and how much I want this. I am incredibly thankful that God has led me through this and that He continues to guide and teach me everyday. I wouldn't be anywhere without that guidance. I can't imagine anything different for my life. I wouldn't want anything else.
   As I'm writing this, I am listening to "Easter" music. Have you ever had days where you are so overcome by how much you are loved? Today is one of those days. I am feeling so loved by God and all the blessings He has given me. Easter always does that to me. (So does Christmas, but I'll save that post for another time.) There are someday's that I can't comprehend the love that God has for me. I can't believe that He would willingly die on the cross for my sins. Not only for me, but for everyone. I get so emotional when I think of the sacrifice that Jesus gave for us.
   It's during this time that I am counting all the blessings in my life. In a few weeks I graduate. I am leaving this place that has been a significant part of my life the last 4 years. It's an incredibly sad thing, but also exciting as I get to head off into full-time ministry. Ambrose has been a large part of this process. I have walked these halls and studied in these classrooms. I have spent time learning and laughing. I have made life-long friends and connections who encourage and teach me. These people have been integral to my growing process and in being a part of my life. I call these people my friends, but some of them are so much more than that. We have shared life and have come together despite our different backgrounds and histories. These people have been such a large part of my own personal growth process that I am struggling with leaving this place. I know that they will always be there for me and that they will always be a part of my life, but it's still hard. We are connected to this place. While it's hard to even think of graduation, I wouldn't change anything. I have been here these 4 years for a purpose. The people who have walked alongside of me through this are amazing. The experiences I have experienced have encouraged and strengthened me. I am forever grateful that I have had the privilege of studying under some amazing professors who have encouraged and stretched my thinking and understanding of Scripture and God. It hasn't always been easy, but was it worth it? Absolutely. And I wouldn't change anything!

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Changes...

Wow... It's already the end of September. In just a few weeks I turn 26. While I was fine with turning 25... it's scary turning 26 as I am officially closer to 30... and I am almost out of my mid-20's. Life is changing and fast. I often am amazed at how fast life is going, and then realize that I am still young. I am in awe of how much I have accomplished in my life.

This year is a year of changes. I graduate this coming April, with a Masters degree. AIYA!!! I can't believe it! 4 years is a long time. That's how long I've been at it. I will be graduating this year with my Masters degree. God has been so faithful during this time, providing for my every need and providing more than I could ever need in order for me to be able to work and do school. These last 4 years of school have been fantastic. I have learned so much and have a continued desire to continue my education after I graduate. Maybe a class or 2 each year depending on what's being offered and what I want to help my supplement my teachings. As a children's pastor, I believe that it is important for me to continue my education in order to challenge my students.

This is also the year that I am going for accreditation with the Christian & Missionary Alliance denomination. That's scary. It means that I can dedicate/marry/bury. It means that my calling is continuously being fulfilled. God is continuing His promises. My calling is continuously being fulfilled. It's a scary process.

This year will be full of changes and challenges. Licensing is scary enough, but I also have to continuously seek after what is next. My contract with my church is finished in May and this is the time that I am asking what's next. Have I ever mentioned that I'm not a fan of waiting... But that is what I am asked to do at this point. I have to wait for the answer.

Changes. What can I say? Changes. The next 8 months are going to be interesting. I can't wait to see what God does!

Thursday, June 12, 2014

What?!? I'm an adult?!?

   Seriously! When did I become an adult? It's like I looked up and BAM I'm an adult. Most days I go around doing what I do, but there are instances where I start to feel older and have "adult" moments. For instance, I filled out a survey the other day and had to enter the age category. It was a weird feeling when I found out that I am in a different category now. I was expecting that feeling at 26, not at 25. There was an 18-24 category and the 25-36 category... That felt weird. There was a moment of panic when I realized that I was no longer associated in that category. I was like "oh no! I can't be that old yet!" It was CRAZY!
   Also, there have been moments in this past year that have helped aid this. I hired a summer intern. For many years, that was my role... now I am on the other side of this... I hired a summer intern... It's crazy! It's starting to hit home that I am no longer young... but that I am an adult, in my mid-20's finishing up a Masters degree, earlier bed times, and doing adult things. It's like there was this switch, and I don't know when it happened...
  Life is crazy eh?